An update on T

So, I've been on T for just barely over a month now. Hurray! I really can't say that I see all that many changes yet. So far, I've been suffering more ance breakouts than usual. But it's nothing that a few Noxema pads won't take care of. I've also realized that I smell a little different. I know that this is odd, but it's true, I swear it xD But I expected that; my good ol' doctor said that men and women smell differently due to hormones. Another change that I've realized, or rather, that my family and friends keep pointing out is that my arms seem bigger. Honestly, I can't really be sure xD I've looked at them, and I don't see a change, but several people keep saying it, so I guess it's true, right?

Anyway, that's enough about T for now, let's get on to something more...depressing.

My grandmother isn't very happy about my transition, like I've mentioned. The other day, she told me that it's been really hard on her, and that she may or may not be kicking me out. If she does this, I'm fucking screwed, I won't sugar-coat it. I can't go to my father and stepmom, on account of my stepmother hates me and practically kicked me out once already. I can't go to my mother, because I'd kill her son (Yes, her son, not my brother,) I can't go to my oldest sister's because she has enough on her plate already, and I can't go to my other sister because I used to live with her and she tried to kick me out - and then I left. I've got no friends that I can move in with, so basically...if I get booted out, I'm more or less on the streets. My father says that he'd let me move back temporarily, but I really doubt that my stepmother would let me back in.

Believe me, I'm definitely feeling the stress, but I'm just trying to take life one day at a time.

I realized something the other day; During my transition so far, no one in my family has ever asked me if Testosterone is making me happier. Realizing this really hurt, because I'm doing this transition to make myself happy, but everyone outside of my friends seem to think that I'm doing this just to hurt them. Yeah...Sure, I'm changing my sex to make the whole world turn against me - I'm not that fucking pathetic, thanks.